Oh, grow up!

Historically, The Big Sis and I have clashed quite a bit, over both big things and little things. I don’t LIKE that it happens, but I do think we’re similar in many ways, which then creates an issue when it comes to dealing with conflict. While we still butt heads from time to time, I can tell The Big Sis has matured quite a bit lately, which has made many parts of our family life much easier.

For one thing, after discussing homework with a friend recently, it occurred to me that while we’re just a month into the school year, with the bulk of the calendar ahead of us, so far our homework battles have been few and far between. And thank goodness, because we’ve certainly had our share of doozies in the past!

I’ve also noticed it quite a bit in how she reacts to situations that are disappointing or don’t go as she expected. I can still tell she is disappointed, but she doesn’t lash out immediately like she might have previously, especially in dealing with people outside our household. For example, the other morning at the bus stop, she said to our neighbor (who is also in her class and who she plays with regularly), “Let’s sit in the back again today!” The neighbor kid, with kind of a mean tone, said, “I’m not sitting with you today.” The Big Sis could have chosen to say something mean or defensive back to her, but she did not; she just let it go. I could read the disappointment on her face, but I could also see the resolve she had to not let it bother her. I didn’t want to say anything at the time, but later I made sure to bring it up and praise her for not turning that into an ugly situation.

I also find that I enjoy my one-on-one time with The Big Sis much more now. Not that I didn’t enjoy it previously, of course, but I feel like we can relate to each other on a different level more recently, which leads to better enjoyment and appreciation of our time together. No doubt the nature of our relationship will morph in both positive and negative ways over the coming years as she gains more independence and experience, but our bond remains through it all.
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